Everything was created last Tuesday!

I have to admit that operating a web site primarily dedicated to exposing fundamentalist Christians as being 1) stupid and 2) vicious is.... well, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel. How hard can it be?

You can’t turn around without witnessing another stupid fundie saying something asinine or acting downright cruel. At least I know as long as these people plague us I won’t run out of material to use. It’s just hard to decide if I should cover viciousness or dumbness. Either one is a tempting choice. But since the last post was about their cruelty it is only fair to balance things out by writing about their stupidity.

The stupid doctrine for today deals with their silly theories of “intelligent design”. As usual they have to explain facts that don’t correspond with the malicious piece of claptrap they call the Bible. The Fundamentalist intellectual (sic) argues the earth is only about 7,000 years old. This in spite of rocks that are millions of years old, this in spite of star light that is now reaching earth after millions of year travelling through space. Since we know the speed of light and can estimate the distance of the stars we know how many hundreds of thousands of years it takes for the light to reach us.But the fundie says a cranky old
deity named Jehovah created it only 7,000 years ago. So why does it appear so old?

Now one response on a Christian web site simply puts it this way: “We have here an excellent example of what happens when one takes the findings of ‘science’ as being greater truth than the Word of God. Science is changing all the time. What was accepted as scientific fact becomes old myth. The Word of God does not change.” Duh!

First science typically changes as new facts emerge which put things in a new, clearer light. The Bible doesn’t change ever. True. It has all the stupid mistakes it had when it was written. They are still there as silly as ever. And the tragedy is that some people are just dumb enough to keep on believing the absurdities merely because they are old absurdities.

Now if the earth is 7,000 years old then why does it appear so much older? The fundamentalist puts his pea brain to work and comes up with a new absurd theory to add on top the old absurd theories he already holds. They have claimed that when Jehovah got bored and decided to amuse himself with a creation that he made it so that it only looked old when it was really young.

Now they don’t know if the Big J put the star light in place instantly or if he just had it travel much faster than the speed of light just to slow it down later. But in their little brains they are convinced that Jehovah made a young earth, because the Bible tells them so and it just can’t be wrong, but that Jehovah played a little trick on us by making it look old.

Now the immediate question is why? Exactly why did their god try to deceive people about the age of creation?

It would seem that he’d have a much better go off things if he created a young creation that looked young instead of a young one that was designed to deceive people into thinking it was old. Supposedly Jehovah wants people to believe in him and worship him. (Sounds just like some people I know.) But then he goes out of his way to destroy any evidence that actually might point to his existence. So he forges the facts to deceive people into not believing in him. This god has serious mental problems. He demands people believe in him. Then he manipulates the evidence so it doesn’t appear he or his “book” are true. Then he punishes anyone who concludes, based on the forged evidence he created, that he doesn’t exist.

If Jehovah is willing to create fraudulent evidence so his young creation actually appears old then exactly how young is it? I mean why assume it was 7,000 years? Maybe it’s only 1,000 years old? Maybe it was created last Tuesday?

So on last Tuesday Jehovah, tricky old devil that he is, created the world. He made the star light appear to have been travelling for millions of years when in reality it’s been around a few days. All the geological evidence he faked as well. And the Bible, claiming it is 7,000 years old? Well, its faked too. You got it. He faked the whole thing. There were no prophets, no Moses, no Virgin Birth, no Jesus, no Paul, nothing. He just had the book, like all the other forged evidence, appear out of nowhere. Along with that he faked the entire history of human kind. as well. He made the pyramids on Tuesday and just made them look old. The memories you have were planted by him. Nothing beyond last Tuesday is real. It’s all there to decieve us.

Jesus is a fraud created to cover up the fact that everything was created on Tuesday.

I suspect fundamentalists won’t like that one bit. But if they theorise a deity who uses deceit to make the earth appear millions of years old then couldn’t he also forge the evidence claiming it was 7,000 old? A god who fakes creation wouldn’t have moral qualms about faking a “holy book”.

In fact if Jehovah gets a kick out of deceiving people what if the fundamentalists have it backwards? What if the old wizard in the sky actually intends to punish those who believe in him while rewarding those who don’t? Can’t rule it out. He is apparently willing to intentionally deceive people. What if the Bible is just another one of his deceits?

Of course the best theory is this one: the earth looks old because it is old. Not hard to figure out. That the Bible says it is young is just another piece of a long chain of evidence which shows the Bible was written by fallible, ignorant men who invented a deity in their own image.